How can you bring it home if you don't ask for it?

Here in San Francisco, there is an awesome food truck called Bacon Bacon. I have been obsessed lately, as those of you who are my Facebook friends can attest. Bacon grilled cheese, bacon jam, bacon log of bacon bacon…which got me thinking about bringing home bacon…

How can you bring it home if you can’t/don’t/won’t ask for it?

We’re coming up on the end of the year, and I’m wondering if you’ve gotten everything you’ve asked for. Did you move that courage-cranking needle at all? There’s still time to get those year-end asks in, as well as to get ready to make 2012 your most courageous year yet. And to give you a little nudge, here’s a tip for today:

Practice on yourself.

I don’t care how you do it. In a mirror, on paper, into a tape/digital recorder, whatever. Ask yourself for something and see what happens. Did you immediately say “no way”? Probably not. Did you waffle over saying “yes”? Possibly. If so, practice convincing yourself. Did you reply with a resounding “YES!”? Well done.

I’ll bet that if you practice asking yourself, you’ll get a little more courageous asking others. Which will make it easier to bring home more bacon.

From "The Craftsmen Series" by Stacey Lee Webber

The seventh annual UC Davis Study of California Women Business Leaders finds that not much has changed in the executive suites and board rooms of California’s corporations. And it may take 100 years for things to get better.

If you don’t want to wait 100 years, then start asking for what you deserve right now. I’m kicking off a year-end sale on the How to Ask for Money Quickstart Program to make things easier for you.

Can I get your vote for Best Coaching Blog 2011? Yep, I’m in the running over at the School of Coaching Mastery’s Best Coaching Blog contest.

In order to make it to the next stage of the contest, I need as many votes as possible by July 9th. You can only vote once, so please head on over and vote now!

P.S.  If you don’t see me on the first page, please scroll to the next and vote…

Check out this post on the importance of asking…

http://www.humbledmba.com/you-dont-get-shit-you-dont-ask-for

I saw an article today on Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg’s commencement speech at Barnard. She challenges women to be more ambitious, to reach out and grab more of a leadership role. Fantastic! Then she said that women should “take a page from men and own their own success.”

Why do we need to “take a page from men”? Why can’t we just “own our own success”?

Or perhaps the question is…

Why are we constantly being reminded that we have to work within a system that so obviously doesn’t work for us?

I’m fascinated (maybe irritated is a better word) by “high-powered” women who tell us to act like men to get where we want to go. I don’ t want to act like a man, I want to act like me. I’d rather fix the system so that each individual, male or female, has the opportunity to rise to his or her full potential, without compromise.

What kind of commencement advice would *you* give?

Check out this new research from McKinsey & Company…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Women have been a growing factor in the success of the US economy since the 1970s. Indeed, the additional productive power of women entering the workforce from 1970 until today accounts for about a quarter of current GDP. Still, the full potential of women in the workforce has yet to be tapped. As the US struggles to sustain historic GDP growth rates, it is critically important to bring more women into the workforce and fully deploy high-skill women to drive productivity improvement.

Click here for more info…

I recently conducted a survey with only one question. I’ve been getting mixed signals from you all, and wanted to be sure I’m delivering what you want and need. So here’s the question.

Do you have more trouble asking for what you're worth, or knowing what you're asking for?

Please check which is harder for you:

• Knowing what I’m worth
• Asking for what I’m worth

And the results? A 50-50 split! I couldn’t believe it. I thought this research thing was going to make my life easier.

What it really showed me was that your lives are tougher than I thought. It’s not just about the courage to ask. That some of you can’t even get to the courage part because you haven’t a clue about what you’re even asking for. That you might need some key foundational help before you even get to the “how to ask” skill building.

Now…to define what it is. Stay tuned…or define what it is for you in the comments below!

About five years ago, I was living on the island of Martha’s Vineyard. One day during that time we were blessed with a rare thing—a perfect beach day, on a weekend (when we didn’t have to work), before July 4th (and the  population increases from 15,000 to over 100,000). My daughter and I decided that chores could wait, and we joined two of her friends and their moms at the beach.

Toward the end of the day, one of these women and I started talking about our work. She’s a counselor and therapist. Although there are differences in how we approach our work, we were seeing similarities in the issues our clients were wrestling with.

• Being so caught up in your job or your business that it’s tough to feel balanced or to take care of your self (I am way too guilty of this one!)
• Spending many years creating a successful career, but living with a nagging feeling that is not what you are meant to do.
• Feeling powerless to change anything.

As we discussed ways to help mitigate these issues for our clients, I mentioned that one of my dreams was to figure out how to get women to band together as a bloc—to vote and/or otherwise influence policy. My friend’s eyes brightened, and she said, “Yeah! Why do you think we can’t do that?”

Now I’ve been asked that exact same question every time I’ve stated that dream. Usually, my answer is, “I don’t know, but I’m sure going to figure it out.”

On this most perfect day, I had an epiphany:

Women don’t believe they have power as a group, because many of them can’t believe that they have power as an individual.

In other words, until you believe and have confidence in your own personal power as an individual, you won’t be ready to join with other people to exercise your collective power. Or, as Alice Walker once said, “The most common way people give up their power is by thinking that they don’t have any.”

When I shared my epiphany with my friend, her eyebrows went up, she nodded, and said, “You might be right.”

The next day, I had coffee with a woman I had not met before. She had recently moved to Martha’s Vineyard, and wanted some advice on her job search. Again, as we talked, the subject of women’s collective power came up. I shared my epiphany with her, and she had the same reaction as my friend on the beach. I know that two is not a statistically valid sample size; however, I do feel like it’s an idea worth exploring some more. What do you think?

And if we are all going to get more comfortable and confident in our own personal power, just exactly how are we going to do that? For starters, just notice when you are using your power, and acknowledge it. I’ve been doing that for the last couple of weeks, and have seen the laws of attraction at work. The more you acknowledge your use of power, the more comfortable and confident you become with it. And, you’re more comfortable talking about it with others.

To acknowledge my personal power, I began writing down my Daily Uses of Power in the same place that I write my Gratitude List every day. But I found I wanted to write more about my power experiences:  why I used it, how I knew I was using it, how I knew I was good at using it.

So I created the Your Own Great and Powerful™ Journal. It includes plenty of space for you to write about your personal power and how you use it. It also has inspiring and thought-provoking quotes from powerful women on every page. Best of all,  you can get a complimentary copy (8-1/2” x 11”, 40 pages, valued at $9.95), by entering your info below:

YES! Download Your Great and Powerful Journal…

Name:

Email:

We respect your email privacy

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And here are some questions to get you started:

• What made you feel powerful today?
• How did you use your power?
• How did others react to your power?
• When and where will you use your power next?

Marianne Williamson says, “That which we do not claim remains invisible…” Don’t let your power remain invisible, turn it on and let it shine!

Got your attention, didn’t I? I bet you’re thinking about solar panels, sustainable energy to power your computer or printing all your marketing materials on recycled paper with soy inks.

I’m talking about the greenest tool of all–money. Well, at least here in the US it’s green.

From "The Craftsmen Series" by Stacey Lee Webber

Money, to me, is a tool. It is merely a means to an end, not the end in itself. Like any good craftsperson, I need as many of the right tools as possible to make sure my work is the best it can possibly be. I’ve put so much energy into finally finding and doing the right work; I’m not about to blow it because my toolbox is empty. My business is not about making money; my business is about galvanizing women to drive the change they want in their world. Let me be clear, however—that does not mean I don’t need or want to earn money from my business. As my business grows, I’ll need bigger and better tools, won’t I?

So I’m getting mercenary. Over the next few weeks, I’ll be working hard to incorporate more traditional methods of marketing into my practice, while maintaining my integrity and avoiding the sleaze factor that seems to be running rampant in my industry lately.

And now that I’ve rattled my money cage enough to bust it open, I am setting off anew on my world-changing journey. No matter what your political or religious or any other kind of leanings are, I’ll bet you’re not happy with the way the world is right now. And I’ll bet you’re not happy with your own little piece of the world, either. In my travels (real and virtual), I’m hearing, seeing and feeling a new and greater restlessness and desire for change. And a frustration with the inability of the “powers that be” (your boss, the local government, the President, whoever) to facilitate that change.

I see women as the army that will push the world to get back on its track—and this effort starts with each of us pushing our own world back on track. Now if you’ve ever tried to move something big, really big, you know it’s much easier with a bunch of people (and maybe even some large, motorized vehicles) pushing on it together. Today, I am heading out to start pushing—no more waiting for my world to magically get back on its track just because I intend it or wish it to. And I’m calling each of you out to join me. If you’re even thinking about it, I challenge you to bust out of your cage and get moving with me!

This post started out with the usual, “What should I write about?” question. I just finished my Big Birthday Sale, and really wanted to deliver some great new kickstart-the-new-year content for you.

You probably don’t want to read this one as you’re going through all your other email with your morning coffee. Please take some time and digest what I’m putting out here. I am in cage-rattling mode, and my own is the first on the list. Keep your hands and arms inside the vehicle at all times.

We’ve all heard the clichés:

Money is the root of all evil.

Having wealth gives you choices.

Do what you love and the money will follow.

Lately I’ve been doing some serious thinking about money. What it means to me, how much of it I really need, how much I want, how I’m going to get it. Perhaps most importantly, how it ties in with my mission:  empowering women to change their world. My big a-ha from these brain aerobics was that I could empower more women if I have more money.

As I think about money (how much I need, how much I want, what I can and will do to get it), someone suggested that I also define my relationship with money. That whole phrase “relationship with money” sounds weird to me. It’s not like money’s alive or anything. It can’t provide feedback or support or make you laugh. So why do I need to relate to it at all? Why can’t I just earn it and spend it and set goals around it without getting all emotionally involved? I really don’t need another “relationship” I need to feel guilty about, or another “person” to worry about making angry.

So I guess my “relationship with money” is not a relationship at all. First major assumption down.

How about you?  Do you relate to money?